Changes

With seven children in our home, my partner J and I decided to celebrate the New Year with the East Coasters. I finished up my nightly portion of homework with four minutes to spare and we ran downstairs to join our wonderful neighbor’s celebration. Casually ringing in the New Year with my sweetheart’s lips on mine, toasting with dear friends and laughing with our children was honestly one of the best holidays I've ever had. 

J and I are absolutely GIDDY about our future together. We've started merging more of our life together and preparing for a life of debt free living, investing and travel. I’m over the moon to have found a man who is everything I could ever ask for.  Instead of aimlessly spending all of our income, J and I came up with a plan to give us direction.  We started by laying our all of our debt, smallest to largest; by using an Excel spreadsheet that shows us how long it will take us to be debt free. Along with our financial goals, J and I came up with a year full of monthly progressive goals to accomplish. J will be sharing our financial goals on his blog, http://cswsiggy.blogspot.com/ and I’ll be updating on the progress of our other monthly goals here!

Here’s the layout of our monthly progressive goals we designed to enrich our lives as a couple.

I hope you had a fabulous New Year. I'm wishing you and yours a peaceful and prosperous 2014!

One Love,
Heathery

American Horror Story

Why is the US Flag displayed Upside Down?

The upside down U.S. flag is an official signal of distress. It is not meant to be, and is not officially recognized as any type of disrespect when so displayed for the right reasons. To the contrary, here is the relevant part of the US Code of Laws regarding how to fly the flag when in distress:

THE FLAG CODE 
Title 36, U.S.C., Chapter 10 
As amended by P.L. 344, 94th Congress
Approved July 7, 1976

§ 176. Respect for flag: No disrespect should be shown to the flag of the United States of America; the flag should not be dipped to any person or thing. Regimental colors, State flags, and organization or institutional flags are to be dipped as a mark of honor.

(a) The flag should never be displayed with the union down, except as a signal of dire distress in instances of extreme danger to life or property.

Most individuals who have served in the military service of our nation will (or should) recognize this signal.

As a result of the many traitors and enemies we as a free people have, both foreign and domestic, as a result of the many unconstitutional acts, legislation and atrocities passed and/or committed against US citizens and their life, liberty and property, and as a result of policies that have allowed (and continue to allow) enemies of this nation to enter in large numbers through a porous border policy, I believe the life, liberty and property of US Citizens are in dire danger and distress.

I love my country. I am honored to support those who sacrifice everything to defend our freedoms. It is my hope that the most recent turn of events will wake up the my countrymen, who seem to care more about their television programs then the government who who have been trying to rob us of our freedoms. For those who are praying, "God help us", That's great and all.. but God was kicked out of our government, so how about doing your job as a citizen, and help yourself. Get informed of your rights, vote, BE the difference needed to prevent this shit-show from happening in the future.

It's not a new concept, I propose we pass a bill that our commander in chief, our "servant of the people", and members of our house and senate have their pay held, should this situation arise in the future. I'm not a politician, but I sure as hell believe that I love America more than the majority of the worthless piles of poo we call our leaders.

Let's talk God.

John Fugelsang delightfully articulates our shared view on God. What an entertaining, friendly conversation between two individuals with differing opinions. 

I enjoy conversing, exchanging personal beliefs and ideas in open forums, so please, if you're easily offended by what I post on my page, realize that YOU alone are responsible for your reactions. Please realize that will never push my personal views on anyone. My only intent is to share my views and experiences. Please feel free to turn this into a friendly conversation, whether you agree or disagree.

I believe in and seek God, NOT specific religions. I do believe in the holy trinity and I do find comfort in certain books of the bible, the same as I do reading the Torah, Quran, Avesta, The Vedas, and Pali Canon collection.

The bible, over time, has been mistranslated and changes dictated by those in power. Reading the bible in it's original text is quite an eye opener, and while I recommend it, I also recommend reading with the consideration that it was written by MEN, it has biases and illustrates views and laws of the times the books were written.

I believe in Jesus, but most people have the Sunday school version of a dude who died for sins and we celebrate birth and death, and that is just the surface of the guy I have come to know. In my youth, I read everything I could about the son of God. Whether you believe Jesus is the son of God or just a fictional character who is supposed to set a good example, the fact remains, the "character" of Jesus is that of a man did more than simply tolerate the outcast of his society. He shared meals, he washed their feet, he served them, he healed them, he never judged them, You know what he DID? LOVED them.

Do you want to know what made Jesus mad?

Those who hurt children. “If you harm one of these little ones, better for you that a millstone be draped around your neck and you be dropped into the depths of the sea” (Luke 17:2).

Self-righteous judgmentalism. As He drove out the money-changers from the spaces normally dedicated to prayer for Gentiles as well as Jews, overturning their tables, He cried out the words of Isaiah: “My house shall be called a house of prayer for all nations.” Oh... I'm sorry... Did you get that... ALL NATIONS.

Essentially, the example Jesus sets for us to follow is, be a light to the world, love your brother, take care of children, and don't be an asshole. Religious sects of all kinds could learn a thing or two.

*steps off pulpit* Happy Tuesday Y'all!

Man, I wish I could say, "The dog ate it."

A couple weeks ago I made a post, then, in true, "oh shit... Did I just put that on the internet" form, I deleted it. I wanted to repost sooner, but my schedule hasn't permitted the time. While my post may have been completely true, I find ranting a wee bit distasteful. I probably should have just edited it. I live, I learn, I'm sorry for committing an apparent blogger sin, it won't happen again.

Anyway, to summarize in a more professional manner, J and I have had some relationship hiccups lately in the romance department. I am hoping he steps up his game, but in the mean time, I have decided to step back and view things from an alternative perspective. I have since seen the little... Yes, less romantic, but none-the-less sweet ways J displays his love.

No relationship is perfect, I am not one to expect perfection either. We are human. We err. Sometimes in our quest for what we think we want, we find what we need. I am grateful for J. For the time being, he is what I need. Can I see this lasting long term? You betcha. As long as he continues accepting my numerous flaws, I'll keep accepting his.

Anyway, "Anonymous", I read your feedback. I appreciate your honesty. I hope one day you choose to be less sarcastic and rude in your approach, but even if you don't... Meh... It is what it is (As stated frequently by a friend of mine, sounds like you may know him).

"Christians"

I'm having a rough day. I have a gentle heart and I can't seem to let people's ignorant, hurtful comments and jabs just roll off my back. If we haven't even had a conversation, or met in person, what makes someone think they know enough about me to justify their less-than-kind behavior toward me?

Also, unless I'm doing something that negatively and directly affects someone else, why should they have ANY interest in the goings on of my life?! It's mind-boggling to me the number of people who say they "Know about my situation", they "Already know" this or that... Unless You hear it DIRECTLY from me, assume you know NOTHING.

You know what's even worse? Most of the negativity I have in my life is brought there by people who call themselves Christians. I am a Christ follower. Aren't we supposed to be sharing God's Love and be a candle to the world? I am not seeing people act like that too often! I see a bunch of gossipy, judgmental, rude, and spiteful people walking around trying to even some invisible scoreboard and I am getting frustrated!

*DEEP BREATH*

Okay... Tell ya what. To the few people who have tried to bring be down, I'm no longer giving you space in my head. You don't deserve my time. To the two women who have insulted my looks... You both are as pretty on the outside as you are on the inside, so maybe you should take a good hard look in the mirror before calling me a "5".  It looks as though I may have to continue to have you in my life, so I pray you can stop wasting your time throwing digs in my direction and learn to focus and be happy with yourself... because you're obviously not and I feel sad for you.

To the rude and gossipy people who have entered my life, WATCH OUT, because I'm going to go out of my way to do something nice for you. Maybe it's been a while since someone has been kind to you. Maybe you need an example or a reminder of how we should treat each other. I'm going to be that example for ya.

Since this is MY blog and I can do with it as I please, I'm going to take away the ammo for future hateful rebuttals.

I am a Christian, and like EVERYONE, I am a sinner (see NIV Romans 3:23).
My Misgivings are as follows:

• I have been cheated on and cheated back. 
• I have unmartial sex (at least once a day). 
• I have had more than one sex partner.
• I entered a relationship with a man during the required 6 month separation period of my divorce.
• I have lied approximately 50 times in my life (including calling in sick to work, and white lies about why I was late). 
• I have said "God-Dammit" and "Jesus" when I haven't been praying. as well as a few other broken commandments 
• I have hated someone.
• I have wished death on someone... heck, a few people.
• I have trouble forgiving certain things and certain people.
• I have an affinity for inappropriate, nighttime behavior in church parking lots (If they are churches of another religion I won' burn in hell will I?)

I am constantly changing and becoming a better, cleaner soul. I prefer to learn from my mistakes, but not dwell on them. If I think I can help someone by sharing my past with them, I will. If someone wants to know me better and asks about my past, I will answer honestly. Other than that, I try to leave my past with my God, live for today and build for my future.

Memorial Day

In honor of Phillip Elgie's friends... brothers. May we never forget your honor and sacrifice.

Marine LCpl. Donald J. Hogan - KIA 08/26/09 Posthumously awarded the Navy Cross
Marine LCpl. Justin J. Swanson - KIA 11/10/09
Marine LCpl. Ralph J. Fabbri - KIA 09/28/10

I remember it being a beautiful Southern California day when Phillip Called me from Afghanistan. I expected it to be a normal phone call, "How is everything, How are the kids, what's going on with the business..." Typical.. Only I heard strain and silence on the other end.

Finally, after a few minutes of my prying, Phillip quietly spoke, "Hogan Died... My friend... Hogan. He got blown up."

I felt my heart drop. I didn't know Hogan personally, but his name had come up in conversation a few times since Phillip had been over "there".

I felt sad for Phillip, for the loss of his friends life, and for a moment i imagined what it would feel like for his family when they had to get that news.. But a few hours later it was back to business as usual. Without a second thought to the sacrifice that was given.

Phillip came home from Afghanistan, and I expected things to be the same as they were when he left, pick up the arguments we had put on hold, take the kids to the beach, but during the days Phillip was quiet, lost in thought, and during the nights, there were terrors. It was then that I began to understand. War and death had come home with him.

It is humbling to see the man you love cry, and it is a different feeling altogether to open your heart to a man who you never met, who you will never have a chance to meet. That is why, every year on the anniversary of Hogan's death, and Memorial day, I remember, honor and silently thank ALL who laid down their lives for their countrymen, as well as pray for those they had to leave behind.

La-La-La-La Life Goes On!

Goodness Gracious! It's been WAY too long since I've have time to post. Really, I don't have the time now, but I figured I'd start writing and see how far I get.

I MOVED!!! I sorted and packed up a two story, four bedroom, two and a half bath home and moved into a tiny 2 bedroom upstairs apartment. *Whew* It's crowded, but I hear that love grows best in little houses (If you don't know the song I'm referencing, here's the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4xCdyMq6z1c).

I happened to meet and become friends with some prominent members in our new town who just LOVE introducing me to everyone and are helping me adjust and settle into the area. My multimedia business took a hit as I chose to focus on family life and moving, so I picked up a part time job, working nights at a cantina to
help supplement the income until I can reestablish my business. I'm learning the ropes pretty quick 

Posing with some of my friends at my new job!

considering I had only ever been a hostess before, when I was 15, and now I'm working the kitchen and Bar! Everyone's pretty friendly and I love the shocked look on people's faces when I tell them I'm nearly 30. I honestly had no idea I looked young. I get 21 and 22 year olds guys asking me out and drinking all night just to flirt. It's great for my ego, especially after years of feeling old and worn down. I have a fresh smile on my face and I highly doubt it's going anywhere anytime soon. *Knock on wood*

My ex (XH from here on out) got his new duty station, teaching his MOS to others at the MOS school on the East Coast. He worked very hard to be able to do this and I am very proud of him! He'll be taking the kids for the summer. I'm weirded out, determined to work EXTRA hard in order to distract myself from thinking about not being with my babies everyday. I am also very excited for my son, "StigKidC". He is floored at the thought of living so close to Washington DC. He can't wait to see the Lincoln Memorial and the White House. My girls are very attached to me, so I genuinely hope they don't give their dad too much trouble... at the same time that I do. XH had the attitude that I should be able to run our business, be a full time mommy AND keep the house up. Hey, some women can, I am not one of those women, and I am very much hoping for an admission from XH that caring for children and working full time is a hard task indeed. However, I will not be holding my breath for an apology, nor do I require one.

My new business manager assisting on a shoot!

Oh, I finally got a business manager, which should help ease my work load. He'll be helping book, set up shoots, collect payments and since he's a photographer as well, I'll most likely be hiring him as a second shooter. He has already helped me on a few shoots and I couldn't be happier with his work and professionalism. It's wedding season so I am very blessed to have found him before all my wedding shoots.

                       

                       Playing catch up on April and May

The day after I moved into my apartment, I was involved in a hit and run accident. A guy ran a red light , hit me and then sped off. It took three weeks to fix up my van, but she's back good as new. Poor Stella.

I dyed my hair red! *Gasp* I love this vivacious, flirty color!

The end of April rang in a very exciting milestone in my family. I am now the mother of a nine and two year old! My oldest, "StigKidC" and youngest, "StigKidA", share a birthday! 

My Washington Bestie and her hubby came to visit! It was great seeing some familiar faces!

My Friends… I love you.

I posted this on my Facebook today, but since I can't seem to link my Facebook and Twitter on this ******* site, I'll just transfer it here.

 My life is tough right now, I'm definitely dealing with a lot of stressors, but when I count my blessings I see that I'm quite a lucky girl. 

I have some amazing people in my life who build me up when I break down, who distract me when I need distraction, never judge me and who help pick me up and motivate me to go do what needs to be done. 

You are worth your weight in diamonds to me. I grew up with the ability to walk away from anyone I ever knew. I have two emotional settings, happy and numb... Over this last little bit of time, you guys have been able to make me feel more. For the first time in my life, I don't feel completely alone. I feel like I have a home. I feel like I belong, and for that, Thank you.

When I tell my life story, most think it sounds rough, but my life is actually a fairytale, granted, not a traditional one, but I have no doubts that my story will have a happy ending. My God has always provided for me, and when my faith is shaken, I have a few amazing friends hat constantly remind me of my blessings. I have much love for you.♥

Momma's Fresh Fish Snack

Okay, as promised, this is my original recipe for a yummy and (mostly) healthy fish appetizer or snack.

What you'll need:

• About 5 lbs of Salmon
• 1cup orange juice
• 1/2 cup brown sugar
• 1box of Triscuts 
• about 3 cups mango salsa
• 8oz Philadelphia cream cheese 
• About half a block of thinly sliced Tillamock Pepper Jack cheese

I'm originally from (Waythefrickupthere) Northwest Washington, where fresh salmon is easy to find, but if you happen to live in a place where fresh salmon is difficult to find, I highly recommend just buying one from Costco. I usually find a $17-$20 fish will feed my family and have additional left over.

After you've cleaned your salmon and have laid it in a lightly oiled glass casserole dish, lightly salt the top side, sprinkle brown sugar and pour about a cup and a half of orange juice over it. Cover with tin foil and bake for about 45 minutes on 400 or until a light shade of pink, baste often to achieve maximum flavor and moisture.  Set to the side and let it cool.

Yea.. It IS as good as it looks (if you think it looks delicious).

 While the salmon is cooling, prep the rest of the snack by spreading the cream cheese on the cracker and placing them on a baking sheet, and slicing up your cheese. I recommend sipping on a frosty alcoholic beverage (unless you are underage, live in a dry county, are recovering or just prefer not to).

  

My "frosty beverage" of choice

Next, layer on the flaky, tender fish

Ladle on the mango salsa, top with cheese and stick back in the oven for about 5 minutes, or until cheese is melted.

Voilà!

Alrighty... Here I go again.

It's been a long time since I posted on a personal blog, before my last child was born (or made for that matter).  So much has changed in the time between, except my crappy memory, which is one of the reasons I'm choosing to post random play by plays of my life events.

I used to enjoy writing. I took all the writing and English classes I could fill my schedule with. That passion for words, grammar structure, creative stanzas and spilling my heart out  over my verbal canvas continued even after my first child was born... My son... My new muse. But alas, life started to complicate and darken and soon the last thing I started to think about was taking the time to write out my thoughts.

My life, like most everyone's, has been one heck of a ride, a lot of me trying to make a rainbow out of unicorn shit and being a doormat for... Well... Everyone.

As the song goes, "Times, they are a' changing", or, "Time marches on" if you're a country fan. It kinda sucks to admit, but I'm currently becoming a statistic, I'm going through a divorce, becoming a single mother of three children. My marriage counselor was kind enough to point out how unmarketable that is, I mean it takes a special kind of guy who will take on a woman who already has kids and I'm not even going to bring up the reality of meeting a man who dates single moms to have access to her kids (sick a-holes).

So where does one find one of these guys? I don't know, all I know is I'm not looking. I've been keeping myself busy by trying to better myself, trying to become the woman I'm destined to be, spending every other weekend going some sort of adventure, looking for work and a new place to live.

Sooo.... Lots to talk about for the next few years I'm sure. If you relate to any of this, or are just curious, feel free to follow along and give input now and again.

~StigMom~
(Heathery)

If you're interested in reading up on the few posts I made years back, the links are http://heatheryelgieinblahblahblogs.wordpress.com/

http://iconicimagesonline.wordpress.com/author/heatheryelgie/